There was so many thoughts and words on my mind before I started writing but when faced with a blank canvas, I guess the mind copied the idea of blank canvas being cool and most of my thoughts, jumbled or not seem to be gone so lets see if it flows back as I write on.
Well, first of all, time indeed does fly and it has been exactly half a year since I have last been on this platform. My once before constant platform that I turn to to express my thoughts has been rocked and it is not because of a New Year or a New Year resolution that made me came back. It's just coincidence that something happened today and it made me thought of this this platform that I once have and will always have. It's like a long lost love whom I know I can always fall back on at any time, any place, waiting for me loyally as long as I intend to return.
The start of a new year and this is the time where everyone seems to be busy making resolutions, except me. The last time I made a NY resolution was at the end of 2k12, over here and wow, that nostalgic sense that is kicking in as I revisit my older posts. I am just smiling in my seat, recalling the times where I have fulfilled some of the resolutions and looking at those that has not been fulfilled yet and wondering if I should make another set of NY resolutions for this year.
The fun part of making a (long) list of NY resolutions is the satisfaction feelings that you get when you achieved it because you get to put a big, fat, tick on those that you have finished. Gives you a sense of motivation, that's what resolutions are all about. It's like a small gentle push that you need before jumping off the cliff on that bungee jump. You know it's going to be alright but at times, you still need that gentle push to help you get going.
Ahh 2014, where to start. Each year has been a roller coaster ride because it's impossible to go through 365 days doing the exact same thing and facing the exact same circumstances everyday but 2014, it has been quite a ride. I've done a lot of things I never thought I was capable of doing, faced a lot of troubles that I never thought I would ever have to face and the year ended and started with a bang.
A short summary to you and to myself of what happened in 2014:
1. Travelled to a few different countries for a long period of time and truly enjoying myself, one of which I travelled there alone, something that I have never done before but something that surprisingly, I enjoyed it a lot and am looking forward to the next travel be it with or without company;
2. Discovering that words will always only be words and you can never measure the depth and value of words that one says: Never hold a person's word too much because it's like water: it can never take a solid form and it will morph according to the situation that fits it best, hence, action speaks louder and carries more truth than words;
3. I have finally truly experienced Autumn, it's really beautiful :);
4. Met up with a friend that I've met online from 7 years back who turns out to be exactly who he says he is and not some psychotic, scary man who would try to run away with my organs or so;
5. Understanding the idea that when one door closes, two more opens up. One friend goes, a few other approaches;
6. Life is funny and things happens in a really weird and unsuspecting manner. It's like cancer, you never know when and how it hits you, it just does and when it happens, you have to deal with it;
7. Finding another me, it's interesting, especially for a narcissist like me who loves mirror, it's like talking to my own reflection but one who actually talks back, which brings me to the next thought <- well when I describes it like this it sounds a little creepy but I meant it in the best possible way!;
8. I have found another me but I am still on a journey to find myself. I am lost at sea and am trying to find that sanctuary, that island that would save me but the question and unknown answer it: Would I find it?
9. I picked up drawing and cooking in 2014, it's really fun while I was at it;
10. Met a celebrity at Apple Store and many more but that's where the list should end for now.
Reading back at the list, it does not sound like I had a good year but in all honesty, I think I did had a good year and am hoping this year would be just as interesting and challenging as the last and I am looking forward to a few things in 2015.
The reason I didn't make a list of resolutions for this year is because I already know what I want (for some) and I will try to achieve it by all means but on other areas, it's still hella grey and I am still looking for my way out.
Another question that lingers: Have I been a better person in 2014 than I was in 2013? Am I a wiser person today than I was last year? I don't know the answer and I can't answer it for sure myself because it would have been a very bias answer but instead of looking back that much, I tell myself to look forward more and strive to be a better person each coming day. Work smarter, be wiser, walk faster, be tougher, love harder, do everything better then at least at the end of 2015, I am able to tell myself, I have tried and did my best everyday, living life to the fullest each day without regrets.
Looking forward to having you, 2015. Lets take on this year together, hand in hand and not against one another! Good bye 2014, I will always remember you :3
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Happy 2k15, mishums (that's who you are, readers!), see you soon <3