Friday, 23 August 2013

Stamp of Approval


Was absent for the past few weeks but it has been a great few weeks.  Took some time off and had a short vacation in Sydney and I seriously fell in love with almost everything about her.  The people, the food, the malls, the WEATHER (something that you cannot comprehend unless if you live in Malaysia where you can't even use the phrase "chill your tits" because the weather is so hot and damp all year long, everyday that the weather simply does not allow your tits to chill) 

Source: the Evil Internet

and also the fact that they love mother nature and not chop off every branch or tree that they see.  Their parks are amazing to no end and everything is just so different, so nice.  Maybe that is why we need some change of scenery once in a while- try different things, try new things and get immersed in it.  Going to dedicate an entire post to that soon, still filtering out the pictures (like a thousand over pictures lol) and when it's all ready, I am going to share that lovely experience and fun time with all of you!

For today, we are going to talk about something more closely connected to ourselves:  The HUGE Stamp of Approval.  You are probably thinking, what is this Stamp of Approval about?  Take for example, after you finish a piece of work or product, how would you judge whether or not you had produced a magnificent piece or if it is just another pile of dung that you should just flung it in your enemy's face?  How do you judge such success or failure?  Do you judge it on your own or are you the type who is concern about what the audience at large thinks?

For someone like me who is abnormally thick face and having skull made of stone, negative comments does not really penetrate through this stone-age skull, thus keeping me happy and staying positive.  Others might think I am delusional or that I am finding excuses to not see something that I am bad at when others point it out but that is not true.  I actually listen to each and every comments that comes to me: nice comments, lovely comments, constructive criticism comments and finally, criticism comments.  

You got to agree with me that almost everyone loves to listen to nice and lovely things that people say about yourself so the first two is naturally approved but for the final two, I take different approaches when I get criticism like that.  I fully appreciate constructive criticism because the audience are telling me nicely that I am lacking something in my latest work, telling me something which I can improve myself on or simply telling me something which they prefer to see me do that would put me in a better light.  These pool of people are people who are trying to help you strive for a better or greater outcome thus continuously make you challenge yourself to greater heights.

The final type of criticism comments normally comes from people who does not like to see good things happen to you and they are trying to bring you down by demoralizing your spirits, telling you that you will never be good enough and that you will never be perfect.  Whatever you do you will never succeed and will never make progress.  Well, n all honesty why do I need to heed to this kind of people?  They are not helping me improve and if anything, they are making me feel horrible about myself and making a loser out of me.  It's like someone telling me that I am never pretty enough, never skinny enough, never perfect enough so what should I do?  Cry like a baby, lash out on the person and then feel so bad and insecure about myself that I go anorexic and after that pain and tires everyone around you who tries to help you out of your situation?  Or do I do what I do everyday, enjoy each and every meal that I get and still dress up when I go out (maybe a size or 2 bigger) but still having people who enjoys my presence and company despite of my current size?  

What both you and I got to know is:  

"The world is not here to please you
You are not here to please the world
You are here to please only yourself "

- mishberries

Your thoughts are your rules, your creations are your life and you should not let other people change that.  

And another thing that you have got to differentiate is:  Is the person really criticizing and not liking your work or did the person simply lose interest in your work?

If the person is simply criticizing you, then I shall refer you to the paragraphs above.  However, if the person is someone who has been very supportive when you first started out, or someone who has been following your work for quite some time but recently the person is losing interest in your work and not showing the support that they were showing some time ago, it does not necessarily mean your skills or work is going downhill because along the way from when you first started out until todate, you've picked up a fair bit of other supporters or fans because of your more recent works.  The case could be perhaps your old supporter has simply lose interest in your current work because one does not simply stay a loyal fan for eternity.  One changes over time and so does one's preferences and interests in things.  

Take a moment and do a reverse thinking.  Put yourself in the shoes of your fans because I am sure that each and everyone of you have fans or people who likes what you do but YOU yourself in turn, is a fan of someone else.  For example, I was such a huge fan of Mariah Carey because she is a truly good singer but after a while, I turn to some other artists because at that moment of time, I find that my taste in music has changed and maybe Katy Perry's song at the moment suits me more.  Just because I am no longer supportive of Mariah Carey does not show that she has done something wrong, her recording has gone to the dogs or she sings horribly.  In fact maybe in her recent albums she outdid herself and sang some alien register note that is higher than her current whistle register note but it is plainly, I am just not that into her at the moment.  Sorry Mariah, yay Katy! 

Coming back to our normal peasant lives and not some superstar lives, it is natural to feel a bit discouraged when you learn that some of your supporters are not showing the support that they used to or liking your creations as much as before but hey, at least they have journeyed with you and they were the ones who were the pillars supporting you when you were still wobbly and uncertain.  As you travel along the journey, you will meet strangers.  Some will join and walk with you, some might not and join another group of travellers and  as you and your companion journeys, you will undoubtly come across a cross road.  Some might stay with you a little longer and take the path that you take but some might have a change of heart and take the other path.  What you should do at this point is to not be sad over those that had left you but move on, continue on your path towards your destination and more will join you naturally along your path.  People come and people go, you and your companions will come across cross roads every so often and some will indefinitely leave you but know this, you will always get new companions, new pillars that will support you along your way and the most important is to not be discouraged when some of them leave you at the cross roads.  They have their own choice and own journey to go and you can't be that selfish or hold on to that nostalgic feeling and not let them.  They too, have their own path and who knows perhaps one day, their path and your path will intertwine with each other in the near future and they will then join in your journey with you once more.

That little story above is to remind all of you and also myself constantly that in everything you do, there will always be people who shows interest in what you do and people who does not show the same amount of interest in what you do as before but that is not because of you but because the person have a change of interest and you have to understand one thing:  they have every right and reason to do so and it is by no fault of yours, especially when you think or even more evidently when you could see yourself improving in your work or the skills that you have.  You should not penalize them and most importantly, you should not penalize yourself.

You can never get that stamp of approval from everyone.  It's like what Dumbledore said to Hagrid after it was leaked that he has a giantess for a mother and some parents are protesting against him teaching in Hogwarts: "Really, Hagrid, if you are holding out for a universal popularity, I am afraid you will be hiding in this cabin for a very long time".

Like Hagrid, you can't have everyone liking your style, your skills, your work but know that you are good in what you do.  You should define yourself and not let other people define you.  Stamp of Approval or not, you are awesome.  I am awesome and you should not let other people tell you otherwise.

Aaaand, that's the end of my long winded post for today and below is a sneak peak of my more light hearted upcoming post about my trip to Sydney!

Source: My iPhone >D

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mish <3